1. Take tomorrow off.
2. Make sure you have several other high-priority tasks to complete so your taxes will be the fun one and you’ll get a head start tonight.
3. But first you have to clean your apartment.
4. Organize all your tax receipts, statements, etc. Sort them into piles and make pretty charts for each.
5. Turn the UPS tracking information from your recent online purchase into an illustrated photo story which you ultimately won’t post because you’ll realize that the time was captured in, like, every single screenshot and it makes you look really pathetic.
6. Look up “procrastination” on Wikipedia and be horrified.
7. Start doing your taxes.
8. Stop to eat a piece of cake.
9. Stop to make this list.
10. Remember how long your taxes took last year and realize you’ll be up all night if you start now. No good can come of that. Close your computer and do your taxes in the morning.