It’s a little ridiculous, taking the train to Boston for your cousin’s college graduation and coming back to NYC less than 24 hours later, arriving about 40 minutes before shabbos to boot. It’s even more ridiculous that it cost me $208. But now I’m in love with Amtrak. Madly! It isn’t just that the seats are so comfortable and there’s wifi and the bathrooms are roomy and the cashier in the food car was so funny, offering to take out the peanuts for the lady who wanted plain M&M’s. It’s what you see from the windows. A thousand snapshots, 99% of which you will just have to remember because there’s no way to capture them all.
2 weeks ago • 1 note
How To Do Your Own Taxes in 10 Easy Steps
1. Take tomorrow off.
2. Make sure you have several other high-priority tasks to complete so your taxes will be the fun one and you’ll get a head start tonight.
3. But first you have to clean your apartment.
4. Organize all your tax receipts, statements, etc. Sort them into piles and make pretty charts for each.
5. Turn the UPS tracking information from your recent online purchase into an illustrated photo story which you ultimately won’t post because you’ll realize that the time was captured in, like, every single screenshot and it makes you look really pathetic.
6. Look up “procrastination” on Wikipedia and be horrified.
7. Start doing your taxes.
8. Stop to eat a piece of cake.
9. Stop to make this list.
10. Remember how long your taxes took last year and realize you’ll be up all night if you start now. No good can come of that. Close your computer and do your taxes in the morning.
