October 19, 2014
NYT, 10/19/14

NYT, 10/19/14

July 8, 2014

This Morning

The 10-ish-year-old boy who tied and retied and double-tied his new puppy outside the bodega this morning and checked on him three times while he waited on line and when someone on the street yelled, “your dog is running away!” ran out of the store and down the block
and everyone—all the customers and all the workers—came out to watch helplessly and stare at the leash still hanging from the hook because the dog had slipped its collar and then someone cried out, “he got him!”
and came back with the dog in his arms and an entirely different expression on his face
probably doesn’t quite understand why everyone followed him back into the bodega and this one opened the door and that one held the leash and everyone just sort of stood around while he paid for his milk.

June 22, 2014

Now That’s a Little More Interesting
(With Apologies to the New York Times)

February 16, 2014

Snowman Awards

February 15, 2014


November 4, 2013

Election Day

Elections again are upon us!
Are you prepared? I am not.
The voter guide sits on my table
I meant to read it but I forgot

But let’s not let that deter us!
The right to vote was hard won
And even if we are clueless
Pulling that lever is ever so fun

We know the two main candidates
And I’ve written about them before.
But did you know there’re 11 others
Vying to be New York City’s mayore?

We’ve also discussed public advocate
Though I might’ve forgotten to post
Let’s skip it as well as comptroller
There are more interesting items to roast

And while city council member’s important
I haven’t the time or the mind
To depict eight potentials in poetry
So I urge you to research online

(But if you, like me, have wondered
What council district you’re in
Look above your name on the voter guide
See “your cd”? I’m se-ven)

Regarding the borough president,
Brewer my vote has got
Not just because she’s the only Democrat
But ‘cos my dad likes her a lot

Now let’s talk about the proposals!
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, and 6!
They’re all a little confusing
So let’s move slowly through the mix

Proposal numero uno!
Shall we allow seven casinos to be?
Gambling is so depressing
But it seems like we need the money

Disabled vets are the subject
Of proposal number two
Something about more civil service credit
Should they later get more boo-boos

I don’t know what to make
Of proposal number three
Extending debt limits and sewage…
Could someone explain it to me?

Let’s destroy the forests!
Say proposals five and four
Oh I’m sorry, is that an opinion?
Forgive me; I won’t do it no more

Last but not least, number six:
Until when should state judges sit?
The way that they phrase it is baffling
I cannot decide or commit

When I started this poem this morning
The project seemed kinda fun
But I don’t grasp the proposals well enough
And I’m tired. you know what? I’m done.

November 1, 2013
October 27, 2013

Central Park Bird or Elizabethan Put-Down?

1) Yellow-bellied Sapsucker
2) Knotty-pated Haggard
3) Hedge-born Younker
4) Common Snipe
5) Swag-bellied Wagtail
6) White-breasted Nuthatch
7) Bufflehead
8) Prick-eared Jack-a-nape
9) Worm-eating Warbler
10) Bunch-backed Rudesby

October 14, 2013

Two tents are better than one. I beg all of you to come out and help us search for my little brother. #findavonte

1-50 51st Avenue and Center Boulevard, Queens, FL


Two tents are better than one. I beg all of you to come out and help us search for my little brother. #findavonte

1-50 51st Avenue and Center Boulevard, Queens, FL

September 30, 2013

When someone you love has been diagnosed with a terrible disease, you will suddenly see this disease everywhere. And if you are trying to avoid thinking about this terrible disease and the terrible things it will slowly do to the person you love, then you are sunk. Because you will suddenly encounter this disease all the time. You will not have been aware of its ubiquity so you might take it personally at first, but then you will realize that you are sad and, maybe, a little paranoid.

You will be particularly confronted by this disease in the pages of the newspaper, with its steady stream of scientific reports and personal accounts. You will start to open the sections on science and health with your heart beating just a little bit faster, with just a little bit more adrenaline flowing through your veins, and you will quickly search for the disease’s name in the headlines like a ship’s captain scanning the Arctic for icebergs. There will be at least two articles per month, which only sounds infrequent to people who do not love someone who has been diagnosed with a terrible disease.

When this person whom you love suddenly adds cancer to the mix, the newspaper will become unbearable. Science and health may be the primary site for cancer discussion but mentions have metastasized to every single section, plus the ads; I’m afraid it’s stage IV for the New York Times. But the next time you confront an article about the first terrible disease, you’ll notice that you can read it with barely a tick in your blood pressure. Your fear will be gone. You will face the first terrible disease because cancer will probably kill the person you love first. This person will die a cruel death either way but you will wonder if cancer will be kinder. And then you’ll marvel that that these are the thoughts you have these days, that these are the choices.